Technology Trend

Responsible Social Networking for Teens

“The best filter is the one between your children’s ears.”
– Parry Aftab, WiredSafety.org

In the explosion of recently developed Internet tools that is called Web 2.0, Internet users are moving from mere consumers of information to producers as well. Youth are among the first to adopt new technologies, and one of the most popular online activities is social networking. Facebook, Bebo, and MySpace are becoming online homes for many American youth.

The extroversion that social networking makes possible is a perfect fit with the drive for self-expression and experimentation that occupies most teens. They create profiles and upload their thoughts and images of themselves and their friends. They make contact with real-life friends and with new people they “meet” online. Some teens count their MySpace and Facebook “friends” in the hundreds.

But anyone who knows a teenager knows that they can sometimes go too far. Youth may have technology skills, but they often do not have the people skills or general wisdom to conduct themselves sensibly on such a public forum. As in real life, teens sometimes do not foresee the consequences of their online posts. And in an age of “reality TV” and loud public cell phone conversations, they may also be unclear about what information is private and what is public. Who could blame them?

For program leaders and for parents, teaching responsible online behavior is a gradual process involving supervision and communication. Leading the way can be challenging, because youth are so quick to pick up new skills online, and may not be open with their elders about their online activities.

Hazards such as cyber bullies and online predators do exist, but those situations may not be as common as you think. Avoiding them, and dealing with them if they do arise, is part of growing up online. Teaching good online practices is part of parenting the online child. As one authority says, “They may know more about technology, but you know more about life.”

There are a number of resources for learning how to guide youth, and program leaders can direct parents to them. One Internet watchdog, Parry Aftab, has several websites with advice tailored for parents, police and the youth themselves. One of them, WiredSafety, contains a guide to staying safe in online social networks.

Understanding how to conduct oneself online is a component of media literacy – the ability to think critically about messages received through television, newspapers, books or online – a subject that is not taught in most US schools. Because the US education system is decentralized, no national standards of media literacy or online security exist. Montana and Texas are the only states with media literacy standards.

There are many resources for educators and parents, however. Medialiteracy.com is the Website of a national advocacy organization that contains resources for educators and parents. The American Library Association is a proponent of online social networking and advocates their use as a tool for teaching reading and writing.

The Media Awareness Network, based in Ottawa, Canada, is one of the leading authorities in the field of media literacy in North America. Its mission is to “ensure children and youth possess the necessary critical thinking skills and tools to understand and safely and actively engage with media.” Its Web site contains educational games for youth, resources for teachers and parents, curricula for teaching media literacy and advice for parents. Canada, France, Britain and Australia all have national media literacy standards for students in their curricula.

Here are some pieces of advice gathered from these organizations, with resources listed below:

• Aftab advises parents to ask to see their youth’s profiles – tomorrow. That will give them the chance to clean the page up if they want to. Then let the youth know that you will be looking at it occasionally. Remember that there may be more than one.
• If you find the online environment shocking, take a breath and get involved. Talk about the information he or she is posting, and alternate meanings that others may derive from their posts and pictures. She may be unaware of the impression she is making. In the same way, help your youth to examine messages that others are sending, and how seeming “friends” may not be who they seem to be. Talk about how online communication differs from face-to-face or telephone conversation.
• Follow the links to your youth’s online friends. They may be posting things about your youth, with or without her permission. If they are unflattering or false, talk about that and how to deal with it. Similarly, make sure your youth isn’t posting unflattering things about others, or revealing things about others that she shouldn’t.
• If a parent believes that intervention is necessary, doing so may not be as hard as you think. Some social networking sites do not allow people under age 14 to join, so if she’s under 14 notifying the Web master could get their account cancelled. But beware – pulling the plug doesn’t teach your youth anything about online conduct. And it may cause the youth to stop communicating with you about what goes on online. Before acting, ask the youth about the code of conduct she would adopt. Teens will often prescribe higher standards of behavior than parents. Then follow up by checking to see whether she is living up to her own expectations and keep talking.
• All sites offer varying levels of security choices. Get to know them if you think your youth is in over her head and the protection should be increased.
• Remind your youth that even if a profile is password protected, the Internet is a global medium and pages are easy to copy and pass along to anyone. How would she feel if the school principal or her grandmother saw the page? Better to present a respectable image than risk damage to a future scholarship, sports team or personal reputation.
• Remember the golden rule—treat others as you would like to be treated. An online argument that turns ugly may still be recorded for all to see years from now.
• Make your youth aware that she is responsible for – and will be credited or blamed for – everything on her page. Stealing images or written works and presenting them as her own is not OK.
• Have some house rules about Internet usage. Reach an agreement about the number of hours per day your youth can be online, the types of activities, and types of Web sites, she can use and that she should come to you if she feels unsure about someone she has “met” online. Make it a rule that she should consult you about meeting any of her online friends in person. And strive to have her computer in a public area of the house.
• Why not set up your own profile and link your page to hers? That way you will understand how she uses social networking, and you may get to know her friends.

You may wish to consult:

Web Awareness Network

Wiredsafety and Parry Aftab’s Guide to keeping Your Kids Safe Online”

Wiredsafety’s online tutorial,“Putting Your Best Food Forward.”

Medialiteracy.com on national curriculum standards

“Teens & Social Networking in School and Public Libraries: A Toolkit for Librarians and Library Workers” published by the American Library Association.

The state of Montana’s Standards for Media Literacy

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